Now that my Zachie’s 12 and oh, sooo mature, he refuses to tell me silly jokes any more.
I miss that time horribly. He was the king of truly terrible puns, and he could barely get the joke out before dissolving into hysterical laughter. If your little people are still open to the fun of the dorky joke, try these on for size…
1. Why did the chicken cross the playground?
-To get to the other slide.
2. What do you call a pig that knows karate?
– A pork chop!
3. Why do bees have sticky hair?
-Because they use honeycombs.
4. Why was the man running around his bed?
-He wanted to catch up on his sleep.
5. What does a robot frog say?
-Rib-bot. (Said in your best robot voice)
6. Why is 6 afraid of 7?
-Because 7 8 9!
7. What’s black and white, black and white, black and white?
-A penguin rolling down a hill!
8. Why do cows wear bells?
-Because their horns don’t work!
9. What does a snail say when it’s riding on a turtle’s back?
10. How did the barber win the race?
-He knew a short cut. ———-
Knock Knock Jokes
11. Knock, knock.
Please don’t cry. It’s only a joke. ———-
12. Knock, knock.
13. Knock, knock.
(Can be used with any animal. Just interrupt the other person with the corresponding animal noise!)
14. Knock, knock.
–Cows say who?
No silly, cows say moo!
15. Knock, knock.
–Owls say who?
16. Knock, knock.
17. Knock, knock.
Little old lady.
–Little old lady who?
I didn’t know you could yodel!
More Kid-Tested Jokes
18. What is brown and sticky? –A stick!
19. Why did half a chicken cross the road? – To get to his other side
20. What’s mom and dad’s favorite ride at a fair? – A married-go-round!
21. Where do cows go on Friday night? – To the MOOOvie theater.
22. What did zero say to eight? – Nice belt!
23. Where do sheep get their wool cut? – At the BAAAbars!
24. Knock, knock. –Who’s there? Banana. –Banana who? Knock, knock. –Who’s there? Banana –Banana who? Knock, knock. – Who’s there? Orange. –Orange who? Orange you glad I didn’t say banana again?
25. Where did the king keep his armies? – In his sleevies!
26. Where do library books like to sleep? – Under their covers!
27. Why can’t a bicycle stand up by itself? – Because it’s two-tired!
28. Knock, knock. – Who’s there? Yourself. – Yourself who? Your cell phone’s ringing you better answer it.
29. How do you make a tissue dance? – Put a little boogie in it.
30. Knock, knock. – Who’s there? Smell mop. – Smell mop who? (Potty humor at it’s finest)
With thanks to supreme joke collector Childhood Beckons