Trust me…I’m the last person to offer helpful advice on this goal, because my entire life has been a pursuit of being more than I am.
It started in childhood for me with a wildly perfectionistic father for whom no achievement would ever be good enough. Alan was very clever at pitting all six of us children against each other for the best grades…the best athletics…the most trophies. And it was never enough. Mind you, I’m not angry at my father, and I suspect it sounds like I am. I do believe none of us would ever have been as ambitious as we are without him. But it starts the vicious cycle of never allowing myself to feel pleasure or accomplishment because it always could have been better.
Parenthood only exacerbated this feeling for me. I could have spent the entire afternoon finger painting with the twins, only to realize that Zoe didn’t get her reading time. I suck!
Are you going through this, too? It’s such a disservice to who we are, and what we’ve accomplished. More troubling, is this something that we’ll pass down to our children?
Satisfaction is not the same as “giving up.” It took me a long time to understand that. There’s a great new book called “Being Good Enough Is The New Perfect” by Becky Gillespe and Hollee Temple. Inspired by this book, I gathered some tips that I thought were worth sharing. These are quick articles, read one at a time when you have a moment. It was so nice to feel a bit a peace after I finished each one.
- Parents who realize they’re “good enough” have less depression and greater life satisfaction.
- Remember the things you did, not the things you didn’t.
- Just 15 minutes can pack a punch–for anything.
- Look at the actual visual difference between “perfect” and “good enough.” Who looks happier?
- Stop trying to be something you’re not.